I have the most exciting news, I HAVE LOST 10 lbs since I started working out!! I have been working out at least 3-4 times a week. I'm currently doing 55 mins on the optical machine, which I burn about 600 calories at a time, plus I'm adding strength training and ab crunches in there.
I work out on average for about 1 hour and 10 minutes.
I watched my hubby change before my very eyes. He's 40 lbs lighter than he was last year. He's a slimmer man and he' looks really good.
We both want to take care ourselves and be healthy, and raise Hayden to be as well. We know us losing weight will take alot of work but were willing to do it. Obviously, because we know it's all worth it.
I really want to get this to stick this time and see results, it's very, very important. If anything I look at my little boy and see that I want to set a good example for him, and it's always important no matter what you have on your plate is to take time for yourself, and take care yourself, I'm so thankful that Erik is willing to make that happen for me to get my fitness needs in just as much as I have done for him all these years.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
And so it happened.
I had a alot on my plate this semester, Erik had Math and Visual Arts, And I had International Business and Women's Health, the homework was constant and the stakes were high. I need to do well this semester. I wanted so badly to get A's. And it happened. I got them!!! I am so proud of myself. I have to say the only I sacrificed with all of this was not working out, but I really want to get a momentum going and hopefully reach my goal.
My papers each time were awesome. I was worried because for International Business. I had a usual assignment due every week and I didn't get it done because I found out that week my Grandma passed away and then it took a little bit to get back into the swing of things with Spring Break. But, I knew that Grandma would want me forge on, and so I did. I also ended up saying to myself during the time of April that I needed to get back to work, and so I did I've been working out consistently for almost 4 weeks. I am noticing an improvement already I have these pants that are 20W that were snug on me before, now their more loose and the 22's that I have are hanging on me so I almost can't where those no more, the one thing I need to do is get under the mark where I can wear my old clothes again, I have alot of 16 size pants it would be nice to get back into those!! One step at a time I guess.
And, now that the semester is over I'm thinking about the summer and all the wonderful things to look foward too. And also that I need to get busy learning my Math, the plan is take it next semester so I need to keep pushing through, this up hill journey isn't over. I have more schooling and more grades that I have to work really hard for. I do feel at this moment I can accosphish anything. So here's to a great semester may I have more like this!!!
My papers each time were awesome. I was worried because for International Business. I had a usual assignment due every week and I didn't get it done because I found out that week my Grandma passed away and then it took a little bit to get back into the swing of things with Spring Break. But, I knew that Grandma would want me forge on, and so I did. I also ended up saying to myself during the time of April that I needed to get back to work, and so I did I've been working out consistently for almost 4 weeks. I am noticing an improvement already I have these pants that are 20W that were snug on me before, now their more loose and the 22's that I have are hanging on me so I almost can't where those no more, the one thing I need to do is get under the mark where I can wear my old clothes again, I have alot of 16 size pants it would be nice to get back into those!! One step at a time I guess.
And, now that the semester is over I'm thinking about the summer and all the wonderful things to look foward too. And also that I need to get busy learning my Math, the plan is take it next semester so I need to keep pushing through, this up hill journey isn't over. I have more schooling and more grades that I have to work really hard for. I do feel at this moment I can accosphish anything. So here's to a great semester may I have more like this!!!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Hawaii is back on!!
OK, theirs been a lot of back and forth about this, but my Mother in law made this all possible. She bought the tickets for Erik and I, at some point we will have to pay her back for the ticket but for now their bought and we are going to Hawaii. Don't get me wrong I'm very excited!! I really want to believe that the trip will be great and it will be relaxing. This trip is happening on May 21st-29Th. I will be in a big suite with my Mother in law, nephew and my husband. Hayden will be staying here in MN with my parents. I'm so thankful my parents are taking him, it's a huge responsibility for them to take it on, and I'm so thankful they are agreeing to it, But, my parents have always tried to help me and make it where I can have opportunities.
The other hurdle was my work I was having trouble with my PTO and that with Hayden being sick a lot this year, I didn't have as much PTO as I needed I was short 1 1/2 days, I'm not happy about this but I have to take an occurrence for this, because I'm short on the time, even though I but in for time off over a year ago. It's frustrating that the company is starting to do that, I'm not sure why. But, at least I'm going they could of said if you go your fired. Which isn't an option.
Erik and I have enough spending money to have a very nice vacation, we are so excited to have this opportunity, Well Erik has been there twice when he was a kid, but this will be my first time.
I'm so excited, I'm making sure to pack my 35 mm camera to take pictures and the camcorder as well.
I have my swimming suit now and it's so cute now I just need a hat, sunglasses and a sundress!!
Only 30 days till the trip!!
YAY!!!
The other hurdle was my work I was having trouble with my PTO and that with Hayden being sick a lot this year, I didn't have as much PTO as I needed I was short 1 1/2 days, I'm not happy about this but I have to take an occurrence for this, because I'm short on the time, even though I but in for time off over a year ago. It's frustrating that the company is starting to do that, I'm not sure why. But, at least I'm going they could of said if you go your fired. Which isn't an option.
Erik and I have enough spending money to have a very nice vacation, we are so excited to have this opportunity, Well Erik has been there twice when he was a kid, but this will be my first time.
I'm so excited, I'm making sure to pack my 35 mm camera to take pictures and the camcorder as well.
I have my swimming suit now and it's so cute now I just need a hat, sunglasses and a sundress!!
Only 30 days till the trip!!
YAY!!!
Sunday, March 6, 2011
I will miss you Grandma!!
My Grandma passed away on March 2nd 2011. I really love her and miss her. Her name was Betty C. Seaburg and she was a young women always, I heard that she laughed her final day before she had a massive stroke and went into a coma. Even when she was in a lot of pain or couldn't breath she always smiled. She was 88 years old. She lived a full life and I was so sad to hear she was gone, she was so relisant in recovering from things. The last time I saw my Grandma was Nov 2009 after Hayden was born we went to Missouri to see Grandma and for Hayden and her to meet, she loved sleeping with him and I'm glad I got to do that. It made me sad to think I didn't talk to her more when she was here. I was always to busy and never had the time to call her. And because of that the last time I got to see her was when she was gone, laying with a blanket around her and eyes were closed.
I really miss her and love her. I am going to try to live my life full and keep in contact with people I care about always.
Love you Grandma, 1922-2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Crazy, busy and full of goals
I know it's been a long time since I've updated, but I was honest that I'm not very good about keeping up on my journal at home, so this isn't any different. I mean to update but never have the time. Right now I should be working on homework as usual but I figured that I have everything under control and should give an update.
About 5 weeks ago I was in a dark place, frustrasted by the fact that not only was not collecting tution reimbursement but that I owed Medica back for it. I had the meeting this past Friday, they came to the conclusion that I owe them 1,200 and that I can use the program, for the leftover amount towards the amount I owe, but by the new year, I will have $100 taken out of my paycheck till it's paid off. I feel that now I'm trapped into taking another semester and I won't be able to take a break from it all. I guess I can juggle it now, but with Erik going to full time in the Fall, I'm not exactly sure how that's suppose to work.
A couple of weeks ago Erik hurt his back, their was no reason for why it was hurting and started chiropratic and physical therapy visits. With our insurance going up this year, he pays $30 each time he goes, which is twice a day, it's been adding up fast thank god we have the FSA account. Erik was not working for two weeks, and in the beginning of him hurting his back, I had to be home with him for 2 days. Erik is only working part time right now, and it's looking like no signs that he will return full time for a while. He also has this dispute with his work on Short term disabitly and how he doesn't qualify, but that they said it wouldn't be a problem, so what does that mean for us? Well, luckily we have money set aside, but the only thing is that was for are Hawaii trip which is looking like a distant memory. I'm not that upset about it because I knew with my Tution thing and Erik's back that it wasn't in the cards for us. Funny thing is Erik doesn't think so he's insisting we can, however I think I'm starting to get through to him and he's going to talk to his Mom about it. It's really expensive and we just don't have the funds, I'm a little annoyed that my mother in law would suggest this when she knows we don't have the money, especially our finincal situation. It's becoming appraent to me, I only wish Erik could see it.
In other news, Theres alot of stuff that I was holding off on until we got our money, that have money been accosphished. Hayden got his shoes. (he has double wide feet right now) We are really working with him to walk, He's getting stronger and stronger each day.
I was able to finally go on my shopping spree and buy myself a bunch of new shirts for work and some dress pants. It feels good to have a wider selection in my wardrobe.
I am as we speak getting matience done to my car, I have 60 thousand miles on it and needed to get it done and an oil change. That's something I've been waiting to do for months.
Erik and I this past weekend got ourselves some new frames and lens, we both have new stylish pair of glasses and we got our eye exams done.
About 3 weeks ago we got ourself a new mastress finally, we were disperatly needed one, the first night we got it we slept for hours and hours, we couldn't wait to go to the bed, that's still the case but we have to get stuff done.
We also did our Cost-co run and brough stuff in bulk that we needed, and we came across Wii or Playstation 3 Active, I love it, I've done 19 workouts so far and I'm feeling great! I haven't lost any pounds, but I can tell my clothes are looser and I feel better about myself. I workout Tues, Thurs, Saturday and Sunday, it works best for the fact Erik's got at school on Monday and Wednesday, and out with his buddies on Friday's. I'm hoping to lose 20 pounds atleast and be under 200 lbs. I then hopfully can lose another 20 lbs by the end of the summer so that's my goal to lose 40 lbs total by the fall!
In other news my classes are going great, I am trying to work up to 2 hours a day on stuff and then I end up having more free time on the weekends to hang out with Hayden, and in the small window of time we have in the evenings.
Today is a very busy day I have my biametric screening at 10 am for work here, and I have Hayden's 15 month appointment today, i'm glad Erik will be able to be there, and my car will hopefully be done today as well. I'm very excited to finally have that stuff done.
I can tell you that, right now I have a mild sore throat that I'm fighting, I really done feel the best today, I'm hoping it passes soon, I really dont' want to be sick again. I've been really trying to keep my stress level down.
About 5 weeks ago I was in a dark place, frustrasted by the fact that not only was not collecting tution reimbursement but that I owed Medica back for it. I had the meeting this past Friday, they came to the conclusion that I owe them 1,200 and that I can use the program, for the leftover amount towards the amount I owe, but by the new year, I will have $100 taken out of my paycheck till it's paid off. I feel that now I'm trapped into taking another semester and I won't be able to take a break from it all. I guess I can juggle it now, but with Erik going to full time in the Fall, I'm not exactly sure how that's suppose to work.
A couple of weeks ago Erik hurt his back, their was no reason for why it was hurting and started chiropratic and physical therapy visits. With our insurance going up this year, he pays $30 each time he goes, which is twice a day, it's been adding up fast thank god we have the FSA account. Erik was not working for two weeks, and in the beginning of him hurting his back, I had to be home with him for 2 days. Erik is only working part time right now, and it's looking like no signs that he will return full time for a while. He also has this dispute with his work on Short term disabitly and how he doesn't qualify, but that they said it wouldn't be a problem, so what does that mean for us? Well, luckily we have money set aside, but the only thing is that was for are Hawaii trip which is looking like a distant memory. I'm not that upset about it because I knew with my Tution thing and Erik's back that it wasn't in the cards for us. Funny thing is Erik doesn't think so he's insisting we can, however I think I'm starting to get through to him and he's going to talk to his Mom about it. It's really expensive and we just don't have the funds, I'm a little annoyed that my mother in law would suggest this when she knows we don't have the money, especially our finincal situation. It's becoming appraent to me, I only wish Erik could see it.
In other news, Theres alot of stuff that I was holding off on until we got our money, that have money been accosphished. Hayden got his shoes. (he has double wide feet right now) We are really working with him to walk, He's getting stronger and stronger each day.
I was able to finally go on my shopping spree and buy myself a bunch of new shirts for work and some dress pants. It feels good to have a wider selection in my wardrobe.
I am as we speak getting matience done to my car, I have 60 thousand miles on it and needed to get it done and an oil change. That's something I've been waiting to do for months.
Erik and I this past weekend got ourselves some new frames and lens, we both have new stylish pair of glasses and we got our eye exams done.
About 3 weeks ago we got ourself a new mastress finally, we were disperatly needed one, the first night we got it we slept for hours and hours, we couldn't wait to go to the bed, that's still the case but we have to get stuff done.
We also did our Cost-co run and brough stuff in bulk that we needed, and we came across Wii or Playstation 3 Active, I love it, I've done 19 workouts so far and I'm feeling great! I haven't lost any pounds, but I can tell my clothes are looser and I feel better about myself. I workout Tues, Thurs, Saturday and Sunday, it works best for the fact Erik's got at school on Monday and Wednesday, and out with his buddies on Friday's. I'm hoping to lose 20 pounds atleast and be under 200 lbs. I then hopfully can lose another 20 lbs by the end of the summer so that's my goal to lose 40 lbs total by the fall!
In other news my classes are going great, I am trying to work up to 2 hours a day on stuff and then I end up having more free time on the weekends to hang out with Hayden, and in the small window of time we have in the evenings.
Today is a very busy day I have my biametric screening at 10 am for work here, and I have Hayden's 15 month appointment today, i'm glad Erik will be able to be there, and my car will hopefully be done today as well. I'm very excited to finally have that stuff done.
I can tell you that, right now I have a mild sore throat that I'm fighting, I really done feel the best today, I'm hoping it passes soon, I really dont' want to be sick again. I've been really trying to keep my stress level down.
Monday, January 3, 2011
2010 UP and DOWNS
It was an interesting 2010 indeed. Here's a recap:
January 2010- Hayden started daycare, the second week he went in to the ER and then was admitted to Children's for RSV, at that same time I was sick and missing alot of work to help take care Hayden and I. Hayden turned 3 months, we took pictures right at the end of the month. Was unsuccessful in my first month back to work, was unable to continue breastfeeding and pumping for Hayden.
February- Hayden and I went to the doctor several times to figure out why we weren't' getting better. I questioned for the first time his little sore that was on his bottom, what I thought could be a blister.
March- Was sick again, the stress of school was starting to get to me, and work was stressful.
April- Hayden turned 6 months, we took pictures again, only this time they didn't really turn out. Both Hayden and I struggled with colds throughout the spring. Also started to making other birth control arrangement, Depo wasn't working and started to get depressed. Hayden went to his first respiratory appointment with a specialist and got some treatment for his asthma and was diagnosed with Acid reflex.
May - Started to walking with my Mom again, and started a workout routine to get in shape. Successfully ended another semester of school. started to struggle paying daycare, and needed some help to get are feet up.
June- Placed IUD in and started to get in shape and working out. Continued to struggle feeling good, and was sick most of the month off and on with colds.
July- Hayden went to a dermatology specialist for his skin and the bump that continued to look like a blister. Had Hayden's pictures done again and they turned out great.
August- Started school again, Erik and I celebrated 4 years married. Hayden had an respiratory appointment finally and it wasn't well controlled asthma had to do some steroids once again.
September- Started to get frustrated about all the pressures, spent countless hours trying to juggle school, work, Hayden and time for myself.
October- Celebrated Hayden's 1 year birthday (with added drama) the day did arrive and went really well. Continued to work through issues with finances and daily stresses. Hayden had unexpected surgery of anal fistula removal. Recovered quite nicely- started to crawl and pull himself up on furniture the very next day!
November- Spent several hours coming in late almost 3 times a week with Hayden's recovery on his bottom (thank god for FMLA) Decided that I couldn't pass my Macroeconomics without failing and had to drop the class- a huge disappointment.
December- Completed the one class remaining successfully with a B, Got a huge breakthrough in getting an A on my Access Exam. The break from school went so fast with all the holidays!
January 2010- Hayden started daycare, the second week he went in to the ER and then was admitted to Children's for RSV, at that same time I was sick and missing alot of work to help take care Hayden and I. Hayden turned 3 months, we took pictures right at the end of the month. Was unsuccessful in my first month back to work, was unable to continue breastfeeding and pumping for Hayden.
February- Hayden and I went to the doctor several times to figure out why we weren't' getting better. I questioned for the first time his little sore that was on his bottom, what I thought could be a blister.
March- Was sick again, the stress of school was starting to get to me, and work was stressful.
April- Hayden turned 6 months, we took pictures again, only this time they didn't really turn out. Both Hayden and I struggled with colds throughout the spring. Also started to making other birth control arrangement, Depo wasn't working and started to get depressed. Hayden went to his first respiratory appointment with a specialist and got some treatment for his asthma and was diagnosed with Acid reflex.
May - Started to walking with my Mom again, and started a workout routine to get in shape. Successfully ended another semester of school. started to struggle paying daycare, and needed some help to get are feet up.
June- Placed IUD in and started to get in shape and working out. Continued to struggle feeling good, and was sick most of the month off and on with colds.
July- Hayden went to a dermatology specialist for his skin and the bump that continued to look like a blister. Had Hayden's pictures done again and they turned out great.
August- Started school again, Erik and I celebrated 4 years married. Hayden had an respiratory appointment finally and it wasn't well controlled asthma had to do some steroids once again.
September- Started to get frustrated about all the pressures, spent countless hours trying to juggle school, work, Hayden and time for myself.
October- Celebrated Hayden's 1 year birthday (with added drama) the day did arrive and went really well. Continued to work through issues with finances and daily stresses. Hayden had unexpected surgery of anal fistula removal. Recovered quite nicely- started to crawl and pull himself up on furniture the very next day!
November- Spent several hours coming in late almost 3 times a week with Hayden's recovery on his bottom (thank god for FMLA) Decided that I couldn't pass my Macroeconomics without failing and had to drop the class- a huge disappointment.
December- Completed the one class remaining successfully with a B, Got a huge breakthrough in getting an A on my Access Exam. The break from school went so fast with all the holidays!
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
When it rains it pours!
Most of us are all excited for gifts and all the treasures that Christmas brings. For me this year it was Ba...hum- bug. The only thing I can say is that at least I wasn't coughing horribly until the end of the holiday weekend. But, the cold couldn't be fought hard enough because this week I've had the cold turn into a terrible cough into laryngitis once again. My voice is so strained that I'm doing everything I can do to fight it and get better. I've taken vitamins, drank tea, got plenty of rest and eat right. And just when I was feeling good, because I was exercising again, I hadn't felt good. This has seriously been the worst year for getting sick. I've been sick more times then I can count. It doesn't help that my job is all about using my voice. It's amazing to me I take the precautions and I still ended up getting sick. The only change is that I would have a sinus or bacterial infection at this point, but because I'm doing every I can I'm able to fight back more.
Not to mention this week I discovered something with work. Not only do I have ill feelings about working for the company. But, I turned in my Tuition Reimbursement like I always do for the end of the semester. I of course had the disappointment bought up again because I had to withdrawal from one course. I was asked to send in all certain information and I did. Only to have the person come back and say that I would not be reimbursed and also that I got money back in error. That I received a grant, and would not be able to get reimbursed. So, now I wait to find out what's going on because they're saying I owe that money back. I have no idea how much, and what's going to happen. The person I've worked with her tone of her email sounded very cold and accusing to me. It's so messed up.
In other news, yesterday I had my interview for the Broker Services Agent position. I was coughing really hard and trying to be as upbeat, friendly and put together for my interview. I think it went really well, and I won't know till next week sometime. I decided to go for a different position in another department because things in PSC aren't going very well. It's a long drawn out story but any case. I feel compelled to stay with the company, and just try to do something else. But, to be honest there more time that passes I so desperately want to get out and start somewhere else. Not that it would be all different. But, there just has to be something better. But, right now I'm stuck and I'm doing what I can for my family.
Lately, I've been forgetful and very out of sorts. I'm not getting the proper care that I should be getting with resting, eating and general stress in my life. I recognize that. It comes down to this whole TR thing, I really wasn't looking that closely and because of my complete non observant self, it could look really bad for me. I still haven't heard from HR and I would call but, I can barely talk as it is.
And last thing, the bills keep coming in, the medical bills from Hayden's birth have come back. His NICU stay was billed to us, Erik thought he paid it and I guess it isn't plus we canceled Qwest and they sent us to collections on a 30 dollar bill. Erik said that he called them and canceled. I swear sometimes he doesn't remember things too.
So, I ask what will happen with our lives? Erik is trying to go to school, work full time and be a father. Meanwhile, I'm trying to go to school, work full time and be a Mom. Are we taking on too much? And how do we get out of it? It seems that Erik and I are screwed. WE rob Peter to pay Paul and get further in debt. I honestly don't know what to feel anymore.
How is it that I get grants from school and that's somehow screwing me big time. I'm at a lost for my next move. I'm so weak and out of it. I have all these constant pressures and I just want it to all go away.
Life is really difficult sometimes, and ever since I was a little girl I had wondered if It was just my life was really difficult, I know that isn't the case, but not only do things keep piling up but that I can't get a break. I try to be positive and upbeat but I almost want to have a whole change meaning a new place/state to live and a new job. I know that won't be happening and plus where would we go? but, between you and me all this added pressure is literally shutting down my body. I hold on to the good things. Like my son for instance, when I look at that little innocent face all I want to do is protect him from everything and take away any pain he may feel. And, now I can truly understand how it is to be a Mom. No matter what I try every single minute to be the best Mom I can be. Being sick, busy or even depressed.
I can only hope that my situations come to a close and everything is right with the world again. Here's to hoping that 2011 brings more hopes and good surprises. I could really use some.
I know I haven't made the best choices in my life, but I'm not a horrible person. I need to feel hope once again.
Not to mention this week I discovered something with work. Not only do I have ill feelings about working for the company. But, I turned in my Tuition Reimbursement like I always do for the end of the semester. I of course had the disappointment bought up again because I had to withdrawal from one course. I was asked to send in all certain information and I did. Only to have the person come back and say that I would not be reimbursed and also that I got money back in error. That I received a grant, and would not be able to get reimbursed. So, now I wait to find out what's going on because they're saying I owe that money back. I have no idea how much, and what's going to happen. The person I've worked with her tone of her email sounded very cold and accusing to me. It's so messed up.
In other news, yesterday I had my interview for the Broker Services Agent position. I was coughing really hard and trying to be as upbeat, friendly and put together for my interview. I think it went really well, and I won't know till next week sometime. I decided to go for a different position in another department because things in PSC aren't going very well. It's a long drawn out story but any case. I feel compelled to stay with the company, and just try to do something else. But, to be honest there more time that passes I so desperately want to get out and start somewhere else. Not that it would be all different. But, there just has to be something better. But, right now I'm stuck and I'm doing what I can for my family.
Lately, I've been forgetful and very out of sorts. I'm not getting the proper care that I should be getting with resting, eating and general stress in my life. I recognize that. It comes down to this whole TR thing, I really wasn't looking that closely and because of my complete non observant self, it could look really bad for me. I still haven't heard from HR and I would call but, I can barely talk as it is.
And last thing, the bills keep coming in, the medical bills from Hayden's birth have come back. His NICU stay was billed to us, Erik thought he paid it and I guess it isn't plus we canceled Qwest and they sent us to collections on a 30 dollar bill. Erik said that he called them and canceled. I swear sometimes he doesn't remember things too.
So, I ask what will happen with our lives? Erik is trying to go to school, work full time and be a father. Meanwhile, I'm trying to go to school, work full time and be a Mom. Are we taking on too much? And how do we get out of it? It seems that Erik and I are screwed. WE rob Peter to pay Paul and get further in debt. I honestly don't know what to feel anymore.
How is it that I get grants from school and that's somehow screwing me big time. I'm at a lost for my next move. I'm so weak and out of it. I have all these constant pressures and I just want it to all go away.
Life is really difficult sometimes, and ever since I was a little girl I had wondered if It was just my life was really difficult, I know that isn't the case, but not only do things keep piling up but that I can't get a break. I try to be positive and upbeat but I almost want to have a whole change meaning a new place/state to live and a new job. I know that won't be happening and plus where would we go? but, between you and me all this added pressure is literally shutting down my body. I hold on to the good things. Like my son for instance, when I look at that little innocent face all I want to do is protect him from everything and take away any pain he may feel. And, now I can truly understand how it is to be a Mom. No matter what I try every single minute to be the best Mom I can be. Being sick, busy or even depressed.
I can only hope that my situations come to a close and everything is right with the world again. Here's to hoping that 2011 brings more hopes and good surprises. I could really use some.
I know I haven't made the best choices in my life, but I'm not a horrible person. I need to feel hope once again.
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